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Ficlet: After-party

Title: After-party
Author: bob_fish
Characters: Riza, Rebecca, mention of Havoc
Rating: R for Rebecca's acute oversharing
Word count: 517
Setting: Fullmetal Alchemist, post-manga - the morning after a somewhat belated victory party
Summary: Acoffee and dish session with Rebecca which Riza is in no condition to enjoy.
Notes: written from a prompt from my flist. havocmangawip asked for "Becky describing Havoc to Riza in a "girl dish session" post Victory Party." This is a sequel to my fic "Fight On, Second Lieutenant!", which is the tale of how Rebecca and Havoc get together, and so this little fic might make rather more sense if you've read the former.
Disclaimer: Not mine. All hail the Great Cow!

Riza was hungover. It didn't take a lot these days, apparently. What had she had at the party, two glasses of wine? Rebecca was rather worse off. She'd ordered her coffee with an extra shot of espresso, and was now shovelling sugar into it, something that always indicated that things were bad. She was, however, grinning her head off.

"Feel like such an idiot for coming into work today. I mean, the office is like a ghost town, it's basically you and Brigadier General Bastard and Falman and our hangovers. Nobody's even working. I could be ordering room service right now." She managed to pack an impressive amount of innuendo into the term room service.

"So," said Riza, unsure of how much she actually wanted to know about the previous evening. The ideal would probably be: yes, we both had a lovely time, thank you, but I do not kiss and tell, we will now form a happy and functional relationship but will also be in no way a bad influence on each other. Once she'd got the whole thought out, she realised that it didn't sound very much like Rebecca.

"Okay, here's my review." Oh god. "Logistically complicated - I can fill you in on that part when we're less public - but awesome. I'd give it 8 out of 10 overall for the night. The 8 is because great as it was, I am sure there's room for improvement." Rebecca paused to take a ladylike sip from her coffee, then continued. "So, you know how you're not always guaranteed an orgasm on one-night stands?" Wait, what happened to when we're less public? "Well, I got two. The first was all right, kind of about average - lots of foreplay, you see - but the second was good, verging on excellent. Quite a long one, kind of more of a vaginal orgasm, which you know, pretty impressive in itself for a first night, no?"

Riza's headache kicked itself up a notch. She looked around the cafe pointedly. Across the other side of the room, two uniformed teenage schoolgirls, evidently playing hooky, were shaking with silent giggles.

Rebecca continued blithely. "I must have been less drunk than I thought, no? This" - she indicated the sugar-laden coffee -"is probably just the sleep deprivation." She paused, took a sip, then tapped her spoon against her chin dreamily. "I would also consider bumping the overall score up to 8.5 for the morning wake-up call. Anyway, Jean's on his way home back East now, but apparently, he says he's back on the team in a month's time for this new job thing, so ..." Rebecca did a little victory dance with her shoulders.

Riza cocked her head. "He told you he's taking the job?"

"Yeah," said Rebecca. She put a finger to her chin. "I'm trying to remember what he looks like in uniform. Bet he fills it out nicely, right?"

"Ah," said Riza weakly. "Want to split a slice of chocolate tart?"

Rebecca looked a little green.

"On second thoughts," Riza said brightly, "I think I could manage a whole piece myself."


( 26 comments — Leave a comment )
Jan. 8th, 2010 07:52 pm (UTC)
YOU are the awesome one right now!
I absolutely love this and I'm still giggling at the "logistically complicated" comment. ;) Choreography does get a little interesting in situations like Havoc's... it's a good thing that Becky seems like a girl who is up for that kind of challenge.

Thank you!
Jan. 8th, 2010 07:57 pm (UTC)
Re: YOU are the awesome one right now!
Thanks, knew you'd like it. Rebecca loves a challenge indeed, and probably spent the intervening month reading up and possibly even doodling little diagrams. XD
Jan. 8th, 2010 08:01 pm (UTC)
Quick comments because I am sneaking on-line in between helping my dad demo the bathroom, but this is hilarious and exactly what I pictures when I read the prompt. Is it bad that I want the "logistics later" portion of the discussion?
Jan. 8th, 2010 08:11 pm (UTC)
It's totally not bad - but I wrote it as a belated 12daysofficmas entry and their top rating's an R, so I had to give Rebecca an uncharacteristic sense of restraint. Boo hiss! I'm going to get to the real pron in that epic Havoc/Rebecca (that is largely about their dating adventures prior to meeting, but is about them together in the end).
Jan. 10th, 2010 01:05 pm (UTC)
Oh, and Hehehehe! and Brigadier General Bastard.
Jan. 10th, 2010 01:14 pm (UTC)
It took me like three read-throughs of that sentence to work out what it meant. I went to a party last night and am feeling rather slow. Yeah, I figured Rebecca probably heard Ed use the nickname once and then adopted it forever, although I believe I'm actually pinching it from "Friday Night, Date Night". I love that she just comes out and says it in front of Riza.

So, thought for the day: does Ed actually use the 'Colonel Bastard' nickname in the manga ever? I actually can't remember him using it ever, but it's all over fanon so I'm guessing anime 1.0? Also, kind of curious as to what it is in the original Japanese. Japanese insults are fun. Perhaps my google-fu can help me.

Jan. 10th, 2010 02:04 pm (UTC)
Hm, I could of sworn that he did. I spent 10 minutes rifling through choice excerpts of manga, and I found: son of a bitch, Colonel Shit, bastard, asshole. There is a panel in the Fullmetal vs. Flame gaiden where Roy calls him small and Ed says something in japanese that obviously isn't nice (could be Colonel Bastard, when googling that phrase came up for that dialogue scene). Now I'm curious!
Jan. 10th, 2010 02:08 pm (UTC)
I think 'Colonel Shit's another translation of the same thing. Can you remember the page references offhand? I'm sort of nerding about this now. I shall look over Fullmetal v. Flame, I thought if it was anywhere it might be there. I think it's around this time I feel the need to pettily point out that Roy wins the match in the manga, because manga!Roy pwns and drinks not the whisky of emo but the coffee of kicking a lot of ass.

I googled too but just found a bunch of fanfic, although strangely enough none of it was actually by colonel_bastard. I was amused that 85% of it was plainly Ed/Roy get-together fic. Pillow talk indeed.
Jan. 10th, 2010 02:14 pm (UTC)
Colonel Shit was when Ed and Al were heading back to Risembool post-Scar and Hughes gives them a message at the train station from Roy (don't die outside my jurisdiction, it'll cost me too much paperwork).
Jan. 10th, 2010 02:20 pm (UTC)
I love that scene. And Hughes says they'll live forever because they're both such brats. Ha! (and sniff, Hughes)
Jan. 8th, 2010 08:49 pm (UTC)
I loved this, really made me giggle! Rebecca, the Queen of TMI XD
Jan. 8th, 2010 08:53 pm (UTC)
Hee! Thanks. I really enjoyed how she went straight not to "he's really sweet and funny" or even "he's hot" but "I had two orgasms and bonus morning fun!" Poor Riza.
Jan. 8th, 2010 10:20 pm (UTC)
random but I like your Badou icon
Jan. 8th, 2010 11:09 pm (UTC)
Thanks - I got it from this post while looking for FMA icons actually - http://community.livejournal.com/churikko/17041.html There are a few nice Badou ones and a good Heine one too. Love Dogs, or the couple of volumes I've read so far anyway! :)
Jan. 8th, 2010 11:26 pm (UTC)
oh thanks. I'm enjoying it too, surprisingly enough (not a real fan of ultra violent manga) but Heine is my favorite archetype (even managed to whip off a little holiday fic for them this year, though it's probably giving Badou too much of a soft side)
Jan. 8th, 2010 10:18 pm (UTC)
haha this is a lot of fun. naughty Riza eating tarts in front of hungover Rebecca. THen again Becky was asking for it with all that TMI
Jan. 9th, 2010 12:09 am (UTC)
Rebecca is sort of permanently asking for it. XD Thanks, glad you enjoyed!
Jan. 9th, 2010 02:34 am (UTC)
i have no doubt of this
Jan. 13th, 2010 06:43 am (UTC)
Oh Rebecca! I love the dynamic you developed between them in so few words. I want to read Havoc's first day now.
Jan. 13th, 2010 08:45 am (UTC)
Yay thanks, glad you enjoyed! If you like Riza and Rebecca here (and Rebecca's antics with Havoc) you should totally read the fic set in this 'verse that my beta enemytosleep wrote me for fmagiftexchange, "Friday Night, Date Night", in which Havoc and Rebecca (but mostly her) attempt to set Riza up on a double date.
Jan. 13th, 2010 05:50 pm (UTC)
Thanks for pointing the way! I really love the timeline.
Feb. 7th, 2010 05:10 am (UTC)
Oh this is such fun to read!! Love the 'logistically complicated' comment too, and the ..review..Rebecca gave about Jean! XD
Feb. 7th, 2010 11:08 am (UTC)
Wow, you've read so much stuff in one night! Thanks.

Yeah, the review was less about Jean and more about how much he got her off, but hey. She's Rebecca. There's more of these guys in "No Small Injury". I was about to type "if you can put up with a little Roy/Ed subtext", but then I clickied your journal and see you have written Roy/Ed NC-17, so I guess it might not be too troubling.
Mar. 12th, 2010 02:50 pm (UTC)
Lol, I do love Rebecca and her shamelessness. ^^
Jul. 16th, 2010 02:57 am (UTC)
Tee hee hee! I ♥ Rebecca -- hell, in another reality, I probably am Rebecca! I love the way you write her, thanks for this.
Jul. 21st, 2010 10:48 pm (UTC)
Thanks! I love Rebecca too. Everyone knows someone a bit like her.
( 26 comments — Leave a comment )